The restaurant would require only the tiniest of storefronts and a handful of employees (Think Lubins-N-Links in Tarrytown). Set up shop along Mamaroneck Ave. in White Plains, crank out an amazing product at reasonable prices, and customers will flock to you like they do for Melt Sandwich Shop.

Remember Field of Dreams?  ”If you build it, they will come.”

To research your potential restaurant, I would direct you to Banh Mi Saigon Bakery in Chinatown — a jewelry store with a Vietnamese food counter at the rear.

I felt bad for the jewelry sales people.  As you can see, not much action on that side of the store.

No, the action’s in the back, where customers queue up for various banh mis (pork, chicken, sardine, pate, or meatball), Vietnamese salads and spring rolls. From what I observed, the pork banh mi was by far the most popular item.

This place operates with machine-like efficiency; one woman takes the order, two women prepare the sandwiches, and a man calls out numbers and handles the register.  In and out in a couple of minutes.

Or, you can eat right in the store on one of the little benches.

For $3.75, you get an expertly crafted banh mi.  Mine was the pork banh mi “hot” (ask for it “hot” if you want it spicy).

The sandwich is a marvel in every way: mouthwatering roast pork, pork roll, cucumber, peppers, pickled radish and carrots, cilantro, mayo and sriracha, pressed tightly inside a fresh, crusty baguette.

I have no doubt I could bring a banh mi neophyte to Saigon Bakery and that person would walk out a convert, with little pork bits falling out of his/her mouth.  The power of the banh mi is that strong.

And that’s why I know a Vietnamese restaurant would do well here.  Who doesn’t like food that’s fast, fresh, tasty and cheap? What would you rather eat, a $6 Subway sandwich with those weird, microwaved slabs of meat, or a banh mi for $3.75?  It’s a no brainer.

(And by the way, in the course of writing this post, I made myself so hungry that I’ve been typing with one hand and grabbing handfuls of Cheerios with the other, just to take the edge off. Banh mi talk makes me voracious.)

Banh Mi Saigon Bakery
138 Mott St. (moving to 198 Grand St. between May and June)
New York, NY
212-941-1541

First though, let me show you the spectacular view from the corner office where I had a meeting downtown. On one side was a direct look at Ground Zero.

I have never seen Ground Zero in person, and to view it so clearly from above like that gave me pause.  It’s eerie — on the one hand it looks like a generic construction site, but then you remember what happened there.

The other window looked out onto New York Harbor — there’s the Statue of Liberty on the left and Ellis Island on the right.

It was easy to picture the scene of 100 years ago, with steamships arriving in the harbor, passing the Statue of Liberty and entering Ellis Island.  When you’re on Ellis Island the place feels weighty and formidable.  From the window it just looks tiny.

Anyway, back to the banh mi search.  I’d been given a few Vietnamese restaurant recommendations in Chinatown that I fully trusted; I’d also read about a Cambodian sandwich shop in Union Sq. serving num pang, the Cambodian version of a banh mi.

My first instinct was for Chinatown, where I knew the banh mi would be fresh, authentic, and undoubtedly delicious.  But I wasn’t thrilled by the prospect of a Chinatown lunchtime rush and the possibility of not being able to sit.  Union Sq. sounded more manageable, and based on the merit of strong Yelp reviews, I headed towards Num Pang Sandwich Shop.

From what I can tell, a banh mi and a num pang are very similar. Both incorporate cucumber, pickled carrots, cilantro and French bread, with some kind of meat choice (at Num Pang there were also options for seafood or roasted cauliflower).

Here’s my pulled durok pork num pang.

The toasted bread was spot on.  The rest — it was all right. Nothing really wrong with it, but the pork was unremarkable and the sandwich was kind of pricey ($7.50) and smallish.  (By comparison, a footlong banh mi would probably be around $3.75).

I left feeling a little disappointed and hungry.  Check that, a lot hungry.  Next time I’ll trust my gut, brave the Chinatown crowds, swerve around the men spitting on the sidewalk, and pick up an honest-to-goodness banh mi.

Num Pang Sandwich Shop
21 East 12th St.
New York, NY
212-255-3271

There’s not much of a sign — that tiny thing in the window is pretty much it.

Yerba Buena’s not a big place, and a boisterous party of around twenty people brought the noise to near deafening levels, but then, what else is new.

We shared a fresh, chunky guacamole with queso fresco and moved into our dishes. For Rishi, the Frita Cubana, slider-like burgers of beef and suckling pig (the pork was nestled inside the ground beef) with pickled jalapenos and a red onion slaw.

I’m a sucker for arepas — in this case, Tres Arepas: chicken tinga on the left, BBQ short ribs, and pork belly on the right — all three topped with a fried egg and spicy, tangy sauce.

Crunchy arepas filled with flavorful meats is my idea of good eating, and pork belly is quickly becoming one of those menu items that makes my eyes light up.  It’s that textural play of a crispy crust, tender pork and soft fat.  I saved the pork belly arepa for last.

After brunch, I was still feeling the urge for a bit more food.  We walked past the iconic Katz’s Deli, famous for its heaping pastrami sandwiches, and site of the Meg Ryan orgasm scene in When Harry Met Sally.

A whole pastrami sandwich would have been pushing it, but a half?  A half I could have handled.  Next time.

And we checked out the mecca of all things pickled, Guss’ Pickles.

Those big red barrels contained all sorts of pickles, peppers, mushrooms, artichokes and sauerkraut.  I buy generic pickles in a jar from the supermarket, but if you’re a pickle aficionado and want the good stuff, this is your place.

(But go quickly.  Guss’, a fixture on Orchard St. since 1920, is closing shop and moving to Brooklyn by the end of the year.)

On my way home, I stood waiting for the 6 train in a subway station so oppressively steamy, we may as well have broken out into an impromptu hot yoga class.  Just another summer day in NYC.

Yerba Buena
23 Avenue A
New York, NY
212-529-2919

My friend Moki made an observation while we were ordering coffee at Dean & DeLuca.  We’d just eaten lunch at Bún Soho and picked up a snack in Chinatown. Now we were longingly eyeing D&D’s food display.  Moki said something like, “How come whenever we go out to eat I’m always hungry again afterwards?”

We thought about it and concluded that we often went out for tapas or Asian cuisines.  Thai, Chinese, Vietnamese, Korean… they all involve rice or noodles that fill the stomach quickly but leave you hungry again after a few hours — or in our case, a few minutes.  And with tapas, forget it, it’s almost impossible to truly fill up without spending a fortune.  I do love my tapas though.

I guess my point is this: If you’re looking for lasting fullness that’ll carry you through the rest of the day or night, tapas and Asian cuisines aren’t the way to go.

That’s no knock on Bún Soho, though.  It was a good meal. “Bun” (pronounced “Boon”) are rice noodles, and they’re incorporated into many dishes at this stylish Vietnamese eatery. We both liked the hot steamed rolls filled with mushrooms.

Moki ordered noodles with hanger steak and finished as usual, about ten minutes before me.

I was in the pho mood — here’s my beef shin and Berkshire pork in a lemongrass broth.  The side of chili sauce helped spike up the heat.

“I’m still hungry,” Moki said afterwards.  ”And there’s no way you’re full.”

‘I could eat some more,” I admitted.

See, it was all very good… it just wasn’t very filling.

We left and sauntered over to Chinatown.  Moki picked up a sesame ball; I grabbed a $.99 roast pork bun.

“Ohh, Patsy’s!” I remarked several minutes later as we walked past one of my favorite NYC pizzerias.  ”I wonder if they sell by the slice.”

Again, we’d JUST eaten.  That’s the thing about noodle dishes — they make a fine meal.  They’re just not suited for two guys with hollow legs.

Bún Soho
143 Grand St.
New York, NY
212-431-7999

That’s Bangers and Mash from Muldoon’s, a Midtown Irish bar. Let’s face it, no matter how health conscious you are, this is the time of year when pub favorites shine and become overwhelmingly appealing.

Take my friend Michael for instance.  He was on a stick-to-your-ribs rampage this week: Pizza for lunch, steak for dinner, burger for lunch; he may have even slipped in a Shepherd’s Pie for good measure, I’m not sure.   

What is it about winter weather that makes us crave hearty food?  Must have something to do with our ancestors needing to consume more fat to get through the long, cold winter months (I have no idea what I’m talking about by the way).

At a recent O’Neill’s outing, Jen and Kevin dug into a salad and french onion soup.

There’s Chuck on the left, and Michael on the right, preparing to inhale, oh, about his third burger of the week.

And who am I to talk?  I got a burger too, savoring every bite.  It was cold out, dammit!

Right down 3rd Ave. from O’Neill’s is the laid-back and friendly Muldoon’s — just what the doctor ordered on this raw and rainy day.

Muldoon’s is doing classic Irish/English pub fare.  Jenn ordered the Bangers and Mash you see up top. I debated between three of my favorites: Shepherd’s Pie, fish and chips and chicken pot pie, finally settling on the pot pie because Sean said something about it being the most hearty.

I make a low-fat version of chicken pot pie at home, and sadly for me, this one blew mine out of the water. The pastry was light and puffy, a perfect compliment to the creamy mixture of chicken, potatoes and peas.  I was so hungry I should have ordered two of these.

There’s the gang after lunch.  We’d come in from the cold and rain, and filled our stomachs with pub grub.  What could be better?

Do you have a favorite stick-to-your-ribs dish when the weather turns cold?  

O’Neill’s Irish Bar & Restaurant
729 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10017
212-661-3530

Muldoon’s Irish Pub
692 3rd Ave. 
New York, NY 10017
212-599-2750 

Some words make me laugh for no reason.  In the food realm I’ve always been partial to “Beefalo” (an all-timer) and “Tofurkey” (Same to you, buddy!)   Now I’ve added a new one to the list: “Shawafel.” 

That’s my shawafel platter from Grill 44 — not actually a new dish, just a combination of chicken shawarma and falafel.   It came with rice, a side of hummus and a salad.  For a quick lunch, I was pretty thrilled with it: $9 (not bad for NYC), surprisingly good quality (the chicken was really tasty) and a huge portion (afterwards I was contentedly full, and that hardly ever happens).  

I also managed to place my order without snickering like Beavis and Butthead, and I learned a new word at the same time.  I’d say that was a successful lunch.

What words crack you up?

While we’re on the subject of funny, you must watch this commercial for the “Neti Pot.”  It has nothing to do with food, but had me falling off my chair laughing.  The commercial is astounding for two reasons: 1) This is an actual product, and 2) The actress’s intensity and commitment to the performance are Oscar-worthy.  HOW did she manage to keep a straight face? Enjoy.

44 Grill
160 E. 44th St. (btw Lex and 3rd)
New York, NY
212-949-0249

Which is how I came to eat at Caracas Arepa Bar in the East Village.

It didn’t take much arm twisting to get me over to Caracas.  I dig Latin food and I dig the words “roasted pork.”  Add in “arepas” and “reasonable prices” and I was there in a heartbeat.

Arepas are a bread-like Venezuelan and Colombian specialty made from corn flour.  At Caracas, each arepa is lovingly prepared and filled with tender meats and flavorful cheeses. They’re also not terribly big, a fact that didn’t escape Moki or me.

“How many arepas do people usually order?” we asked the server.

“Usually two per person.”

Oh, poor fellow, he doesn’t know who he’s dealing with.   We can eat.  Moki and I have had numerous experiences of going out for tapas/ small plates, getting hungry two hours later and hopping into a Pizzeria Uno for a second meal.

The plan was to order a few dishes to share, and re-visit the menu later if we weren’t full.   Here’s our appetizer, plantains with aged cheese.

Sounded like a weird combination, but it went together surprisingly well.  Moki only had one complaint: “I wish the plantains were wetter so the cheese would stick.”

We moved on to a shredded beef, cheese and plantain empanada, and a chorizo and chicken arepa.

In the spirit of sharing, Moki split the arepa in half.

The empanada kicked butt: crispy without being greasy.  I could have eaten ten of them.  The arepa was also very good, but maybe the weakest of the ones we tried.  It needed some oomph, so I dipped it in chimichurri sauce for a tangy kick.

The roasted pork belly arepa needed no such sauce.  What an insane burst of flavor and texture.

The meat fell apart and there was just the right amount of fat to chew on.  And let me just say how flawless the arepas were — definitely the best I’ve ever had (okay, so I’ve only had them like twice).  But still.  They were crispy on the outside from being grilled, soft on the inside and slightly sweet from the corn.

At this point we were happy and still hungry, so we ordered two more arepas.  This one was filled with roasted pork shoulder and a spicy mango sauce.

And finally, grilled chorizo with peppers, cheese and jalapenos.

I like spicy, and um, biting directly into a jalapeno certainly did the trick.  Wow was that hot. I was sitting there making weird faces with my mouth on fire while Moki was talking, until he noticed my pain. ”Are you all right? You look uncomfortable.”

“I ate a jalapeno. That thing is friggin’ hot.”

Yeah, it was painful, but it felt so good.  I can’t wait to go back to Caracas Arepa.

After dinner we both got it into our heads that we wanted mochi.  Moki knew of a Japanese grocery store on St. Marks that carried them, but they weren’t the right brand.  We’re mochi snobs.  We ended up at Shima Restaurant on 2nd Ave., where I ordered a plum wine and two servings of green tea mochi.

Then it was off to Winebar for a glass of red.  No real reason for this pic, but I kind of like how funky and weird it came out.

Sometimes you go to a restaurant because you’ve read about it; sometimes you go based on the recommendation of others.  I was lucky to be given a recommendation to Caracas, and now I’m going to pass the recommendation on to you.   Go, and enjoy your arepas!

Caracas Arepa Bar
93 1/2 E. 7th St.
New York, NY 10009
212-529-2314

Shima Restaurant
188 2nd Ave.
New York, NY 10003
212-260-6303

Winebar
65 2nd Ave.
New York, NY 10003
212-777-1608

That’s breaded and deep-fried goodness my friends, and it was my lunch at Katsu-Hama.

Katsu (breaded and fried cutlets of pork, chicken or other meat) is extremely popular in Japan, and you see it on many sushi menus here in the U.S.  At Katsu-Hama, katsu is pretty much all they do, and they do it very well.

The first thing Danielle, Maridel and I noticed upon entering was the glorious smell of fried food (which immediately attached itself to our clothes for the rest of the afternoon).

There were also all sorts of fun things to look at and play with. The server brought over my miso soup, then set down a mortar and pestle with sesame seeds.

I had no clue what they were for (the rice maybe?), but frankly, I was too lazy to ask, and plus it was fun crushing the seeds anyway. There were a variety of different sauces, including this one in rather unfortunate looking containers.

I wasn’t positive which sauces were meant for my katsu, so I ended up trying them all (which I’m sure was all wrong, and the servers were probably looking on in horror as I defiled their cuisine… next time I’ll ask a few more questions.).   

The ladies enjoyed their pork katsu and egg on rice.

And I scarfed down my minced beef and pork katsu — not only beautiful to look at, but awesomely crispy on the outside and moist on the inside.  Greasier than other katsus I’ve eaten, but that was probably due more to the minced meat than the breading.

Good stuff and well worth a trip for the katsu lover.  If you find out what you’re supposed to do with the sesame seeds, please let me know.   

Katsu-Hama
11 East 47th St.
New York, NY 10017
212-758-5909 

That’s not a Disney World PeopleMover you’re looking at; it’s the conveyer belt at Sakae Sushi, a Singapore chain restaurant that’s brought its futuristic touches to NYC.  The conveyer belt winds around the entire restaurant carrying traveling plates of sushi, ready to be picked right off the belt.  A cool concept… uh, if you’re not slow like me.

“I can’t figure out if this is real food or plastic display food,” I said to Danielle.  

She looked closely.  ”I think it’s real.”  

It took me a while to figure out that it was indeed real (The fragrant smells gave it away). 

The other unique thing about Sakae Sushi?   Each table has a computer that allows you to look at the entire menu and place your order without speaking to a server.  

We had fun with the computer, ordering a spicy crunchy tuna roll and an eel roll topped with tofu skins.

The lightly fried silken tofu in broth was delicate and delicious. 

Would I even think of concluding a sushi meal without mochi? Of course not.  Green tea mochi was strangely missing from the menu, and Danielle despises red bean (I’ll convert her, give me time), so we went with vanilla.

The menu here is ten times more varied and interesting than most sushi restaurants; there were literally dozens of items I wanted to try.  Everything we ate was excellent (especially the tofu — yum) and I enjoyed the weirdness of the computers and sushi conveyer belt.  George Jetson would love it.

Sakae Sushi 
405 Lexington Ave. 
New York, NY 10017
212-286-8868 

Danielle works right around the corner from me, so I convinced her to take a lunch break (those crazy magazine publishers are always on deadline) and walk over to Bôi to Go to see what they’re all about.  She was game, and off we went.

You’ll notice the big difference between the banh mi here and the ones in Chinatown…

Those are fair prices for Midtown, but they sort of contradict the whole mystique of a banh mi, which is partly that it’s so darn good, but also that it’s so darn cheap.  Still, beggars can’t be choosers, and Danielle went with the bbq pork banh mi. (Not only her first banh mi, but her first taste of Vietnamese! Hopefully a fanatic was born.)

I had every intention of ordering a banh mi — hell, that was the whole reason for going. But then I paused — maybe I was worried that nothing could top the ridiculous “Mr. Lange” sandwich I’d eaten the day before, or perhaps I was flashing back to the Vietnamese noodle bowls I’d had in San Jose, but I called an audible and decided to go the noodle route instead.

Bôi to Go keeps things simple and makes ordering a snap: You choose a “preparation” (I went rice noodles), a “meat” (bbq pork all the way) and a “sauce” (red hot pepper sauce — bring the heat!). Then I threw in a spring roll for good measure.  Very delicious actually — a big fat spring roll filled with chicken and vegetables and served with a hoisin dipping sauce.

The noodle bowl hit the spot.  Everything was fresh and the bbq pork was lean and tasty (corn and lettuce were an odd addition though).  The pork in San Jose was better — it was sliced thinner and had a stronger grilled flavor — but for Vietnamese “fast food” this was more than adequate.

Danielle enjoyed her banh mi too, although she said the toasted bread made it messy.  Bôi to Go isn’t the best Vietnamese I’ve ever had, but it’s comforting to know that should a craving strike, it’s right around the corner.

(We also saw a sign that “Bôi Sandwich” is opening soon on 3rd Ave. between 44th and 45th. Hooray!  That’s even closer!)

Bôi to Go
800 Second Ave. (at 43rd St.)
New York, NY 10017
212-681-1122